Credibility = zero.
When did I lose my sense of self?
I must have left my esteem at the door with my jacket and shoes.
I know you're non-confrontational, I am too.
Believe it or not.
And if neither of us confront the other, we're only standing still.
Is that okay with you?
Because I miss you and I kind of hate the idea of that.
I think it's a little fucked up that I'm sitting here missing you,
all the while wondering if you've even given me a second thought.
Have you?
I've been losing sleep over this.
You may mean more to me than I do to you,
but I've got a bad habit called 'getting attached'.
In case it's not so obvious.
I don't know what made me think I'd be able to bite my tongue and apologize.
Retrospect is a bitch.
Don't listen to a word I say,
because I know I couldn't do the same to you.
You're not replaceable.
I don't care what I said at the time.
Lost track of how many people I've gone through.
It's reminiscent of getting coal for Christmas.
I just miss you.
As far as selfish goes, I'm giving you a run for your money.
For sure.
I'm selfish, controlling, and I don't deserve what I've got.
But I'm trying and I might as well say it.
Suck up my pride and wipe away my tears because...
"the best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact is to realize that two out of three ain't bad"...because I'm sorry.
And I apologize if I don't mean as much to you as you mean to me.
But I've got a bad habit called 'getting attached'.
And if neither of us confront the other, we're only standing still.
So tell me you forgive me?
Make me feel like it's okay again?
Or don't, but I'm hoping you do because there's too much space and silence without you.
And I'm feeling kind of pathetic and poetically pointless.
Take from this what you will.
Just know that I'm sorry and I miss you.
Xo.
